Creating The New World, Part 1 Love

Do you create your life freely or do you live within the limits of the existing system? Do you realize you have the power to change the system, and eventually the whole world, when you make a change that is not limited by the existing system?

I want to dream big and write about how we can create the New World based on the foundation of love, light, truth, abundance and power. Because big dreams inspire us and provide us the essential direction of our lives. How can we make the decision of which road to take when we don’t know the big picture and the overall direction?

Plus Ascension provides us the rare opportunity to change. We live in a special time when significant change is possible.

What love is not 

First we need to know what love is. And few words have been abused as badly as the word love.

1. You don’t know what love is if you think unconditional love is special.
If you think there is unconditional love, which is a better kind than other kinds of love, let me ask you: What is love that is not unconditional? What is conditional love?

• I love you if you (lose 10 lb, quit complaining, help me more around the house, etc.)
• If you love me, you would (stop drinking, work harder, etc.)

These are just forms of manipulation, in the name of love. I know most of us have been conditioned with this from childhood, but let’s make it clear this has nothing to do with love.

2. You don’t know what love is if you sacrifice yourself in the name of love.
Love starts with self love. There is just no way to love others while ignoring your own worthiness or letting yourself abused. And if you think self love conflicts with love for others, look around carefully. Love gets stronger with more love. Conflict is an illusion made from the fear of scarcity.

3. You don’t know what love is if you think love is about holding hands and not saying anything uncomfortable.
Uncomfortable to whom? To that person or yourself? You may say you don’t say certain things because you care about that person’s feelings. Well, I care about people’s feelings, too, but I also know that, when someone think in this line, they are usually hiding the truth, and the truth is they don’t say it because it makes themselves uncomfortable.

We sure don’t need to offend people’s feelings unnecessarily. But hiding the truth under the name of love is very unloving.

Loving darkworkers

The last point leads to the issue of darkworkers. It sounds nicer to say that there is no such thing like darkworkers and we are all good loving souls, hug one another, and ignore the energy sucking dramas some of us are acting out. But is it true? And is it helpful even to the darkworkers themselves?

It’s helpful for darkworkers to continue their way, yes. If they are to come back to Light, however, they get the best chance when people around them set up a clear boundary so that the darkworkers cannot get any energy from them. Tough love, sure, but what is the point of covering up their acts?

This is not about fixing them. Let them be who they are but put your self-love in place. Awareness of what is really going on, factually and energetically, is the start of love.

Then what is love?

My definition is love is the awareness that we are valuable for our individual uniqueness and yet we are all part of the whole. I love you for who you are. No need to change unless you yourself wish to change. And together we make a union that is more than the sum.

We are like parts of one body. The kidney is valuable for its unique function, and so is the heart. The heart doesn’t put down the kidney because it deals with urine. Our respective uniqueness is our strength — we don’t need kidney to become more like the heart.

Sometimes, a part of the body starts doing strange things. It starts to suck up energy from the surrounding area, making the area difficult to function fully. We don’t need to hate this part of the body, but we do want to focus on our ability to function fully and give our attention to the working parts, not the malfunctioning parts. This is how we “love” darkworkers.

But what about romantic love and relationship?

I think romantic relationship and family unions in the New World will be very different. I’m not against the idea of romantic love — it’s a beautiful form of love — but I do think the consequent idea of romantic relationship and the institution of marriage are abused badly.

Think for a moment. If the New World operates on the foundation of love:

• Do you need someone to assure your worthiness by being with you?
  Of course you don’t. You already love yourself as you are.
• Do you need someone to promise to be with you for the rest of your life?
  You don’t need to force love and security in such a way. Relationship is best when it is based on free will, at any given time. And forced love is not love, whether it is forced by yourself or by others.
• Do you need to form a secure haven called family?
  If the outside world is a savage cruel place, it makes sense to build a safe small haven, and this has been one of the major function of family. But if the New World is all about love, where is the danger?

So what is the role of romantic relationship and marriage in the New World? While we operate on the big love, it’s also good to form close connections so that we can get to know each other better and we can share ourselves readily. Romantic relationships can be one of those relationships, along with others like friendships.

We’ll loosen up a big time in forming and maintaining romantic relationships. You may have just one partner or multiple of them at any given time in your life. Your living arrangement can be flexible, too, beyond the traditional form of living with your family. If you enjoy being close to others, you may choose to live in something like a co-op that is formed on the basis of shared interest (say, similar eating or exercise habits, or artist co-op that shares studio space, etc). If you like traveling, you can do so. Or you may like solitary living arrangement. Whatever you choose, you are accepted and loved.

Sexuality in the New World

Romantic relationship and marriage are considered to be the only “correct” forms of sexual relationship at this time. So when we loosen up our idea of relationship, what happens? Do we become promiscuous?

First, it’s important to realize that your sexuality is yours. It’s not your partner’s nor of some authority in government or religion. You decide the when, with whom, how. This is especially important for women. Do not let the conventional “you are either a madonna or a whore” idea limit you.

Next let’s admit we get into the act for many reasons other than love and pleasure. Have you had sex with hidden agenda like:

• To prove you are (attractive, strong, worthy of attention, etc.)?
• To control your partner (to keep them to you, to get them do something, etc.)?
• To distract yourself (from boredom, loneliness, frustration at work, etc.)?

All these conditions will be worked out when we operate on the foundation of love. So sex with hidden agenda will go away.

Contrary to the promiscuous sex-overloaded society that some people may have thought when I said “New World based on love”, I think we may have a lot less sex in the New World. When you realize you are free to choose the type of sexual relationship, and you don’t need to bring in hidden agenda — when you choose to have sex just because you feel like it or to share some fun and pleasure with your partner — I think the demand would naturally decrease. Of course, it’s also quite fine if you are into providing joy big time.

How to bring in the New World

First, I want to emphasize it is totally counterproductive to think of the New World as how things SHOULD be. The should mentality, the expectation, automatically put it off to some unknown place in time and space. The time to start the New World is NOW.

Here are some things you can do today to bring in the New World:

1. Forgive yourself and others so that you can start anew. Forgiveness is a form of self love.

2. Live in gratitude. Gratitude is an expression of love. Don’t discuss how important gratitude is; say thank you to your loved ones, to things around you, to nature, to life.

3. Talk about the new way of life with your loved ones — your relationship partner, family, and friends. Embracing the possibility is the first step of actually living it.

4. Allow more and more love in your life. Do you do what you love to do? Do you talk to yourself with kindness even when things turn difficult? Do you spend time with people you really like? Do you express your love in a simple, straight-forward way without fear?

5. For each person you interact with, find some unique gifts they have and tell them how much you appreciate them. We can use a lot of assistance in realizing our beautiful qualities in us.

The “gift” doesn’t have to be some holy, noble, rare quality. For instance, a pretty smile is something we can treasure. (Do you realize how so many people, both men and women, would be delighted to hear how cute they are?)

6. Think more ways to cooperate rather than compete. If you are in business, are there ways you can work with others in the same or related fields that would benefit all involved? If you are studying something, can you also teach each other? Competition is based on scarcity and fear. Cooperation brings in more love and abundance.

7. Try something new. This requires self love and assurance, and in tern reinforces the same. And you will meet more people to love, learn more things to love.

8. Are there people in your neighborhood who would benefit from extra attention and care, such as older people, single parent with small children, etc? Why not strike up a casual conversation and let them know you are happy to help when they need something? You might be delighted to find how something small and easy to do for you can be appreciated so much. Offer your love and kindness freely.

Kids really belong to the “village” and we all want to be looking over them. Your community being safe and operating on love will expand to larger community.

9. When you go shopping, talk with the cashier. Treat the storekeepers like real people. Eventually, get to know them as your friend. Same with the bus drivers, the librarians, the customer service reps who answer your 800 calls, etc.

10. If you are in abusive relationship, whether it is romantic relationship or family situation or work related, please have the courage to leave. You are doing a disservice not just to yourself but to the whole by staying there. First, stop participating in their drama. This will likely make them more abusive in their attempt to get your energy, which will prompt you to leave finally.

11. Again, offer your loving words and actions freely. Let go of your agenda. Let’s talk, hug, kiss, and make love with no expectations but just because. Also, feel free to say no.

Love and the fifth dimension

Some people say the fifth dimension is love. I thought about this — length, width, height, time and . . . love?

What I think is there is no polarity in the fifth dimension. Everything is in alignment, and we call this love. In a sense, polarities have helped us learn our life lessons by providing contrast. But as we progress in Ascension and graduate from the school of life, we don’t need polarity any longer. We can just be. This is the ultimate destination we want to take our New World.

Does this mean we are going back to the original utopia like I described in that article? Not quite. I don’t think nature repeats exactly the same way. In the New World, we will be living in love similar to the original utopia but in a more conscious way.

Do you have more ideas to bring in the New World of love? What do you think of my vision of the New World? Let me know by leaving your comment ^_^  (Photo by carf)

How Darkworkers Control You And The World

Do you realize the majority of your thoughts and decision-makings are manipulated?  Do you know the world is held down the way it is for the darkworkers’ continued benefits because, if and when you wake up to your natural potential, the world will change so much for the better so fast that no one will be giving their energy to darkworkers? 

There are many ways darkworkers have been controlling this world for many years by influencing the way people think.

I’m starting a five-part series of how we can create the New World based on the five energy flows of Love, Light, Truth, Abundance, and Power, but before that, I want to give you a big picture of the darkworkers’ manipulation system.   (Photo by paulaloe)

If it’s obviously dark and evil, it’s no good as manipulation

First thing we want to be aware of is that there are many hidden manipulation systems beyond what is obviously dark and evil.  In fact, if an idea is obviously dark and evil, you would be careful with it, and so it doesn’t work as manipulation.  No, darkworkers do a much better job than that.

The challenge of unraveling the dark work is that it is so well masked.  So people believe in it wholeheartedly.

The damages these dark works do, however, are scary huge.  We have been wasting our energy and lifetimes because of the manipulated ideas and the fear they cause.  And it’s ongoing because we are not aware we are manipulated.

Presenting false limitations

One way darkworkers control you is to make you believe in certain limitations.  The limitations may be about you personally or about us as a certain group.  For example, you may have been told or led to believe that the highest position you can attain in the corporate world is such and such  — that you can’t become a senior management because you don’t have a higher degree.  And they use statistics that show the majority of senior management have higher degrees.

Now stop and think.  The stats was about the majority of senior management.  Even today, there are those who hold top management positions without advanced degrees.  And even if 100% of today’s senior management had advanced degrees, that is no proof you can’t become a senior manager without the degree.  There is no such law.  The senior management position is NOT limited to MBA holders.

You are tricked by the stats.  You mixed up probability and possibility.  And you give up your dream and try to be content with your current career options.  You spend your life energy keeping up with the Jones while you stay practically in the same place.  No big change to the world system, another good day for darkworker authorities.

This is just one simple example, warn you.  There are tons of “advice” flying around that are designed to keep you where you are, and then there are tons of people who blindly repeat saying what they have been told, reinforcing the collective sense of limitations.

Some more examples of false limitations:
1.    False limitation: You have to be young to become an entrepreneur.  There is a certain age limitation.
Truth: You can start your business any time.  (And many do.)

2.    False limitation: You have to be old to earn people’s trust.  There is a certain age limitation.
Truth: You can earn trust by being you.  (By the way, if you buy into both #1 and #2, there is no time in life you can become an entrepreneur.)

3.    False limitation: You must have experience to be good at something.  The learning process is limited to certain pattern and timeframe.
Truth: You may be a genius and a fast learner.

4.    False limitation: You need many people’s support to make a difference.  Your own power is limited.
Truth: You can start and gain momentum as you go.  Most support only comes after you start.

5.    False limitation: You must be (smart, good-looking, rich, from a good family, etc. — in short, to be perfect) to succeed.   Again, your own power is limited.
Truth: You succeed by doing it.

What other limitations do you currently believe in that hold you down where you are?

Presenting false priorities

This is about setting up a goal that is not really the best case scenario but only secondary, thus wasting a lot of energy in the meantime.  The false priority goal is indeed a good goal, perhaps worth pursuing in the general sense, but still it is a waste of energy to pursue when you can aim to achieve the truly important goal.

For example, there has been a big discussion about general health insurance in the US.  People spend tons of time and energy talking about how wrong it is that there are so many people without health insurance.  And how we can possibly make the general health insurance plan possible.

Now I actually support general health insurance plan.  However, health insurance plan is not as important as increasing the level of everyone’s health.  When we are all basically healthy, we may be able to make most health care (especially preventative care) free, like public education is free.

But that part of discussion is ignored because:
1.    We believe raising everyone’s health is more difficult – maybe impossible.  (which bring us back to the first point of false sense of limitation.)
2.    If we actually work on increasing people’s health, big chunk of industries will be at risk.  Like junk foods makers and restaurants.  Over-the-counter medicine makers.  And even healthcare industry itself.

Again, this is just an example.  We are led to put our energies on secondary priorities, leaving the most important issues intact.

• Is learning history, such as about holocaust, important?  Sure.  But not as important as ending the current war.
• Is national defence important?  Yes, at this time.  But not as important as bringing world peace, and ultimately, making a borderless world.

It works on the personal life level as well.  For instance:

• Is getting a good performance review important?  Not really, especially if your goal is to start your own business.  Your priority in this case is to learn about your new business, to lay out the business basics, and to learn marketing.

Can you think of other instances of false priorities?

Presenting false goals

This is when they promote goals that are not really natural and that most people fail to achieve, therefore making you feel like a failure.  The trick of false goals is to make the goal feel achievable, and make people believe others have achieved it.  A variation of this is to use goals only a few people can achieve.

An example of false goals is the idea of finding a soulmate, or the one ultimate life partner with whom you are guaranteed to have supreme happiness ever after.  Now I am not against the idea of monogamous love relationship – as long as it is the natural result of two individuals’ independent choices.  It’s a result, not a goal that you have to look for everywhere, strive to achieve all your life, while ignoring or suspending your true feelings.

But movies and other mass media make it feel that is the ultimate happiness you need to spend your time and energy on.  Married people also try to believe they made the right choice and play it out, rather than honestly saying, “I love this person.  I’d like to be with him or her although I don’t really know what tomorrow brings.”

False goals often come with lots of hypes and is presented in the form of “If and when you become (fill in the blank), you’d be happy.”  And while you work so hard toward the goal, putting the majority of your energy on it, ignoring the happiness right there for you, most of the social system is left intact.

How you have been made to run like a race horse

Basically, darkworkers treat you like a race horse.  First, they put the blind of false limitations on you so you can only see what is in front of you, making you think you have no other options but to run on the track.  Then they show you false priority or false goal to make you believe you have to run hard toward them –  the goals they set and don’t really affect them.  They also give you the whip of fear – both subtle and not-so-subtle ones.

You run hard, without knowing there are green meadows just beside you off the racing track.  Not only that, you are actually a person, and you can create this green meadow when you redirect your energy from running on the track to creating the meadow.  The truth is you don’t have such limitations that keep you on the race track.  You don’t need to work on the project someone else said it’s important.  You can make your own goals while you enjoy being you.

The challenge of raising your awareness

When you first start noticing the control mechanisms of darkworkers that you have been taking, you may feel confused.  So many ideas you have believed so long . . . maybe untrue and counterproductive to you?  All the time and energy you have spent on those “goals” are . . . wasted?

The confusion may show up as anger, either at the darkworkers or at yourself.  Or at me – hey, what’s this little girl talking about?  Let’s just sniff off this doubt that is growing . . . let’s just get back to how we have always been living and thinking. . .  if we ignore it, we can stay the way we were. . .

Exactly.  If you are so happy with your life, you don’t need to change.  If, on the other hand, you want better life for yourself, for your loved ones, and for the world, read on.

It’s critical not to blame the darkworkers, either.  After all, we gave them our energy and power.  They tricked us, but we are responsible for our own awareness.  What we need to do now is to raise our awareness and quit buying into their BS.  Blaming darkworkers does no good.  In fact, that is still a way of giving energy to them.  Don’t try to “fix” them.  Just raise your awareness.  Start living with your new awareness that you can think for yourself and set up your own path and goals.  Know that you have plenty of power to create your own life.

Do you know other ways darkworkers manipulate us?  Or do you think this world has been working just fine?

Dodging The Many Forms Of Psychological Manipulation

(Photo by cobalt123)

One of the major challenges of living fully is the mind manipulations from people around you.

People – including your loved ones, unfortunately – will try to hold you down where you are by various forms of manipulation. When we aspire to live fully and make changes in our lives, we need to be watchful of these manipulations and learn how to dodge them.

I don’t mean those who manipulate are bad people. Manipulation is typically based on fear, and they are only trying to keep things at status quo because they themselves are scared so much. Nonetheless, manipulation is very harmful to your growth.

Do you recognize these manipulation techniques?

Some manipulations come in such subtle and seemingly innocent forms. My list here is only a partial list of so many variations of manipulations. . .

1. Pointing out potential problems

Example:

“You want to start your own business that resonates more with who you are? Oh, that is wonderful. I wish you luck. So many startup businesses fail within five years, the statistics says, though. . .”

Does he really know what the stats mean? Is he with you to better the chances? Or is he just afraid himself, and wants you to be afraid, too?

This manipulation often utilizes statistics or failure stories they heard somewhere. It sounds realistic, practical – and uninspiring.

A variation of this approach is to point out the negative side effects. They may admit that the change you are trying to implement is positive, but also point out the potential negative effects.

Example:

“ You want to start your own business? Are you aware how many hours self-employed people have to work a day?”

Some even imply you might lose your relationship. . .

And they often add this line,

“I just don’t want you to get into trouble.”

2. Direct put-down disguised as a joke
Example:

“It should be illegal for non-MBA’s to start businesses – what the heck do they know, lol, look at the failure rate (add demeaning body language here)! Hey, I didn’t mean you! Cheer up.”

It’s supposed to be unsociable not to understand jokes, and they utilize this social conditioning. They say something really un-nice, and when your feeling is hurt, they treat you as naïve.

Here is my acid test for jokes: Does it make you feel light and warm or does it leave you a nasty taste in the mouth? This test works for all kinds of jokes, whether it is aimed at yourself or others. Watch out the fake jokes.

3. “Count the blessings” you already have
Example:

“We are happy as we are. We should be. Look at what you’ve earned – and there are lots of less fortunate people out there, you know. . .”

This is a twisted logic. Of course, we, each one of us, are blessed as we are. But it doesn’t mean we should stagnate where we are. Don’t feel guilty for seeking more.

4. “What is the point?” apathy
Example:

“Well, you know it takes so much work to be successful in business. . . Do you really want to do that? You are ten years from comfortable retirement. . .”

From their perspective, the glass is always half empty, no matter what you do. They don’t even point out potential problems. They don’t pretend to be content. They are, in effect, half dead and want you to be the same.

5. Acting out
Example:

You talk with your family about your decision to go back to school. Everyone seems happy. So you start the application process. Suddenly, out of the blue, there is a surprise in the family – some kind of crisis – like your spouse’s car breaks down and you need a chunk of money to buy a new car. Then you find out your brother is checked in for rehab and he and his family really need some moral support. And . . .

I don’t mean they cause the crisis on purpose. It just happens – one after the other – until you are completely distracted from your aspiration, or you figure out “It’s just not the right time.”

How to cope with manipulation

You don’t. Coping only encourages more manipulation. Dodge them, and just do what you have to do.

Just do it.

I took the extreme route and moved myself across the Pacific Ocean. This was not just to dodge manipulation from my family but was in line with my dream to complete college education and build a new life. Nevertheless, it ended most of the subtle and not-so-subtle manipulations. Prior to my migration, they tried to change my mind by counting the blessings of the comfortable life in my home country. They even tried to bribe me. . . “Do you want a new dress? We can dine out at nice restaurants if you stay around. Are you aware you will be financially stressed if you go to America?” They also threatened me that I’d be robbed and murdered in America – very realistic-sounding potential, but somehow I have happily survived for 13 years – and counting. Oh, and they tried to dampen my dream. “Why do you need to complete your education in the US? What would you get for the time and money you invest?. . .”

I’m not recommending you to move thousands of miles to dodge manipulation. But do know action – the action toward your aspiration — is the antidote to manipulation. I don’t think talking back or reasoning things out work really. Nor reactions to manipulation.

“The significant problems we have cannot be solved at the same level of thinking with which we created them. ” Albert Einstein

Is manipulation from your family and friends an issue for your personal growth? How do you deal with it?

Thanks to Lexi for including this post in Creative Growth Carnival, to Peter for inclusion in the Change Carnival.