Now the ultimate question to this premise is “Why, then, don’t we get what we want? Why is it so damn hard to have what we desire, like making enough money from my hobby so I can quit my job or finding my life partner?”

There are two things to consider here. One is the misuse of the Law of Attraction. The other, main point of this article, is surrendering to the bigger purpose of life.

Misuse of the Law of Attraction

Common misuse of the Law of Attraction includes:

1. Focusing on NOT having what you want instead of acknowledging the good things you already have and desiring to go further to have it.

Let’s say you are single and want to find a mate for intimacy and personal sharing. Someone you feel attracted and want to spend a lot of time together. Now, do you feel good about yourself — do you find yourself lovable and trustworthy? Are you grateful for the life you have now, for your friends, your past romantic partners for making you the person you are now? Or are you feeling lonely and miserable, needing to find that special person? If it’s the latter, you probably attract more of not having a mate. Or you attract someone that matches the loneliness and misery you harbor.

2. Not being clear and consistent about what you want. Many people seem to know exactly what they DON’T want, but not clear about what they want.

Do you find yourself desiring a life partner one day and then, on other days, saying something like “Oh, I’m just too busy to have a relationship right now. I want a raise…” This is like changing your order at a restaurant. Please be clear and consistent about what you want — this involves sincere exploration of your true desires.

Surrendering

Then there comes a point of surrender. This is different from giving up your desire because you see yourself as a powerless victim of life. This is about surrendering to the bigger purpose of your life that your conscious mind may not readily perceive.

Let me continue the example of finding a life partner. After my divorce, I decided to spend a year to recover my sense of well-being and to rebuild my life. Eventually, I felt ready for a new relationship. I actively sought out a new partner. I joined match.com. I asked my friends if they knew someone single. I did meet many men. But none led to long term relationship.

Was I doing something wrong? Back then, that is what I thought. Although I couldn’t put a finger what I was doing wrong.

I was quite happy with my life. I don’t say this in a way like, “I have a good-paying job, I have great friends, I’m fine. Nothing is wrong with me.” kind of way. Yes, I just wrote this line in a tongue in cheek kind of way because I saw so many online profiles like that. The truth was, yes, I was happy with my life, my job, my social life, but I wanted a romantic relationship and I couldn’t find it.

So, I wasn’t focusing on the negative NOT having part of my desire. And I was fairly consistent in my focus. Even though I didn’t know the term “the Law of Attraction” back then, I was taking the right approach.

Not getting what you want and be happy with it

Then I decided to quit my corporate job and relocate across America to Oregon. Gee, I couldn’t have done this if I had a boyfriend in Tennessee. I’m really accommodating when I’m in a relationship, and I most likely would have given up — or wouldn’t even have entertained — such idea if I were in a serious relationship.

I didn’t get what I sincerely desired — a life partner, an intimate relationship. Looking back, am I upset about this? No. On the contrary, I’m grateful. I couldn’t see far enough into the future when I was busy meeting men, but now I think this is exactly how I am meant to be living now. I can spend my time doing what I am meant to do — doing the Akashic Record Reading service and writing about spirituality — without the constraint of monogamous relationship.

This is what I mean by surrendering. You may not get what you desire, and it may be just as well. You will see how so much better it is not to have your wish come true — if you open up and accept the gifts of not having it, if you surrender.

Revelation

Recently I had a mini revelation. The memory of my first boyfriend popped in my mind suddenly. Well, I didn’t have sex with him, but I consider him to be my first boyfriend. We were seventeen years old. It ended prematurely because I was an exchange student in Australia and had to come back to Japan at the end of the year. I used to wonder what my life may have been like if I could stay and could keep seeing him.

In a flash, I saw myself with him together. Living together in a house. With kids. Doing the everyday things — get up, breakfast, get the kids ready for school, rush, work, etc. etc. The life I could have had with him. And OMG. I was tired of the repetition within a second!

I always knew I was not meant for motherhood — I find children adorable, but I was never big on becoming a mother myself. The biological clock that so many women talk about — I just never felt it. This — not particularly craving motherhood — was fine with me. But as I’ve been saying, romantic relationship was a different deal. I thought I really wanted it. Living with the guy I really like (and he likes me too), sharing all aspects of our lives. I thought I wouldn’t even mind taking care of kids if that’s what it takes for the relationship. 

But no. When I saw that psychic vision, I realized I’m not meant for the regular marriage.  Even if it’s a good one.  I am meant for something else. For what? Well, look, I already have it. I can freely pursue my interests, build my life and my business. I connect with my clients with love. And being free from the conventional lifestyle keeps my thinking free and my body ageless.

Somehow I surrendered to the bigger purpose of my life. My ego mind could not see it for so many years, but my Higher Self knew what was best for me.  This is how creation works sometimes. 

(And now, from this liberated place, I can date ^_^ I see my new date from time to time while keeping my life my way.  It works.)

Are you ready to surrender?

Or are you attached to a certain outcome? In other words, do you simply desire something or do you NEED it to happen?

I suggest you take a big breath and look at the things you so want but haven’t got in your life. Is it possible not having it is actually better? Can you see the big picture?  (Photo by photomason)

The Law of Attraction has been attacked by many, including many personal development bloggers.  It looks to me that the easiest way to prove you are “smart” is to disagree with the Law of Attraction.  If that is what you want, you probably don’t need this article.  If you want to improve your life effortlessly, please read on.  (Photo by Trader Doc)

Misunderstanding the Law of Attraction

To understand misunderstanding, we first need to define the Law of Attraction.  For now, we will say “Like energy attracts like energy.” We will explore the deeper meaning of this law later.

There are a lot of misunderstanding going around about the Law of Attraction, discouraging people to use it to their favor.

1. Magnets don’t attract the same, they attracts the opposites.  So the theory of Law of Attraction is flawed.
One end of a magnet attracts the opposite end of another magnet so that as a whole, the magnetic energy flows through in one way.  Magnets attract magnets, not woods.  It is indeed attracting the like energy.

2. The Law of Attraction is not a law because it is not proven.  Plus the whole quantum physics stuff is BS.
Did the law of gravity become the law when Newton theorized it?  Or was it working from the beginning of time?

Regarding the quantum physics – what I gather from Greatness Without Genies: The Law of Attraction for Realists is that this area of physics is still in debate and neither proven nor defeated.  We just don’t know if the quantum physics is real, and if so, to what level of existence it applies, nor how it is related to the Law of Attraction.  So let’s give it a benefit of doubt.  (By the way, this eBook is an interesting read if you disliked the Secret.  Especially if you disliked the Secret but still feel the pull of the Law of Attraction )

3. The Law of Attraction doesn’t work because I couldn’t attract what I wanted.
Ah, but did you use it properly?  For example, if you wanted to be financially well, did you focus on abundance or did you focus on you being broke?  If it’s the latter, the Law of Attraction worked perfectly – you got more broke.  I feel for you, but don’t use your failure as a proof of the Law of Attraction not working.  It’s a case of operator error.

The final point leads to the point of how to use the Law of Attraction correctly.

Is it the thoughts or the feelings that attract?

Many Law of Attraction books tell you that your thoughts attract the very thing you think about, that thoughts become things.  Well, kind of.

Are you aware there are two kinds of thoughts?

1. Logical thoughts (or non-ego thoughts)
2. Ego thoughts

Typical example of logical thoughts is when you think about math.  How do you know the total sum of all inner angles of a triangle is 180 degrees?  There are several ways to prove this.

While you are thinking about triangles, parallel lines, or vector, you are thinking hard, but you don’t attract more triangles.  Because your feeling is neutral.  (I’m talking about pure mathematical thoughts, not your fear of failing the math test.)

On the other hand, we spend a lot of time and energy doing ego thoughts.  What will the economy be like?  Will I be able to keep my job?  Will I have to take a paycut?  Will I be able to afford the vacation this year?  And if I can’t, what would my friends think about me?  OMG, and . . .

Ego thoughts use tons of emotional energy.  And it’s usually negative thoughts based on fear.  And bam, don’t you know you get a layoff when you spend sufficient time and energy thinking this way?

The energy of emotions

When the Law of Attraction teachers say you attract the things you think about, they are talking about thoughts, or images, that are supported by plenty of feelings, the energy of emotions.  Thoughts are energies as well, but compared to the energies of emotions, thought energy alone is pretty small.

In order to use the Law of Attraction to your favor, you need to think in a way that causes you lots of positive feelings.  You can do this in both kinds of thinking.  One, you can manipulate your own ego thoughts to aim the things you want, rather than the things you don’t want.  For example, tons of money.  This way you can stimulate your greed and cause “positive” feelings of joy and excitement of having it.

This approach works, and some people have become quite good at it.  However, I don’t recommend it.  Because it can whack your sense of peace and harmony.  When you base your joy on greed, you need more and more things to satisfy your greed, and the state of just being happy with what you have become further and further away.  To me, this sounds like hell than heaven.  Having more and more, but never really satisfied.

So the better approach is to use your logical thinking and add feelings.  For the same objective to attract money, you think of money and what money can buy in that logical neutral way, for yourself and others, and then be inspired to have positive feelings such as joy and gratitude.

Better.  But isn’t there an even better way to utilize the energy of emotions?

The problem of thought-based feelings

There are two kinds of feelings:

1. Feelings that are caused by specific thoughts
2. Feelings that come from your core, unrelated to specific thoughts you may be having

We are familiar with the first kind of feelings, and this is also what the Law of Attraction advocates teach us to utilize.  They teach us to use emotions as a guide of your thoughts.  Thoughts on what you desire cause positive feelings.  Thoughts on what you don’t desire cause negative feelings.  Watch your feelings to monitor your thoughts.

When you do this, you notice your feelings are very unstable.  Having and not having something is like the sides of a coin and it can flip so easily.  One moment you are feeling great thinking about getting a raise – you are inflated in your emotions – the next moment, the thought of missing the raise crosses your mind and you are deflated miserably.  Up and down, up and down.  It takes lots of discipline to manage this process and disallow negative ideas to enter your mind.

And this is the biggest challenge those who try to use the Law of Attraction face even when they so believe in it.  They mix up thoughts and feelings, and the positive and negative energies negate each other.  Results: no clear results.

You’ve seen these people, or maybe you are one of them.  Are you afraid of thinking negative thoughts?  To the point you are afraid of using “bad words” like debt or loss?  When you try to direct your thoughts to “good” things you desire, you know (oh, damn you know!) there is a flip side.  The bigger your desire, the bigger your fear of not having it.

And if you are so afraid, of course, that is what you attract:  More fear and more situations that cause you fear.

Enough about playing between the polarities.

Emotions without thoughts

You don’t need thoughts to have feelings.

When I wake up after a good night sleep, I feel wonderful. I’m full of excitement and gratitude for the new day.  It’s not about being excited about specific things I plan to do.  These days, I hardly have any plans.  I have a natural routine and maybe I have some phone sessions scheduled, but my good feeling is not about these things.  It’s about being alive and another beautiful day.  Little me having another day!

When I sip coffee watching the trees and coffee, I feel wonderful. I’m filled with joy, wonderment, and contentment.  I’m not thinking about anything particular – I just like relaxing with coffee and looking at trees.

And what is this good feeling doing in my life?

My life is pretty good.  My business is growing, I have great friends, and I’m healthy.  Hmm.  I guess I could be happier with a boyfriend.  But then, there are hardly times I feel lonely.  So maybe I’m doing just fine.

So the most effective way to utilize the Law of Attraction, that is also the most effortless, is:
Cultivate the good feeling that comes from being yourself

Aaaagh, so simple. . .

The fundamental good feelings of life in the Law of Attraction

You may think it’s difficult to cultivate this fundamental good feelings about life and yourself.  However, once you have it, it’s pretty solid.  It’s not based on external conditions.  You realize that you are loved and supported in all ways, that you are special and valuable, and that the universe is a wonderful and friendly place to live and play.

From there, you live your life, and of course, you think.

So I live in good feelings majority of the time.  Then I occasionally think – let’s say thinking about my business.  Perhaps the most frequent thought is “Well, I enjoy doing the reading and clearing, and I know this is the foundation of my service, but this new coaching is so much fun I want to put more focus on this.  And I’d like to free up some time to do more writing, too.”  My business is developing exactly this way.

So thoughts have their place in the Law of Attraction.  But not necessarily a big place.  The majority of the energy is based on emotions, and thoughts only give directions to the energy.  And again, the easiest and surest way to have lots of good feelings is to base the feelings on who you are, not on external situations or your thoughts.

Cultivate the good feeling that comes from being yourself.  Then think some to direct the energy.

Where does action fit in the picture?

There are people who say something in the line of, “The Law of Attraction works because it promotes positive thinking that motivates people to take actions.  It’s not a spiritual law, and there is no mystery to it.  Now go do your work.”

And what kind of action are we talking about?  Actions that come naturally that you hardly think you are making “efforts” or actions that you toil and loathe?

The latter has indeed nothing to do with the Law of Attraction.  Do action A to cause result B.  Use whatever motivation to get to action, including positive thinking or “psyching up”.  Or a whip.  I mean, it’s the action that causes the result.  Motivation is not directly related to the result.

The kind of action we want to be aware of in using the Law of Attraction is the first kind.

Beings is not about sitting on a stone and doing nothing.  Being involves doing things you like and doing things that interest you. Watch small kids.  Being kids, they are almost always moving and doing things.  Jumping on the couch.  Swirling around the chair.  Running outside.  And when they find something interesting, they just go ahead and explore it.

The action that matter in the Law of Attraction may be doing the things that you so love to do always or taking special inspired action.   Or it may take no action.

Manifestations without action

You’ve never seen people attracting great life without no particular action?

My former hairdresser in Tennessee more than doubled her clients list overnight doing nothing.  She was leasing a booth in a small hair salon.  The owner was the other hairdresser and his wife.  They wanted a baby for a long time and finally decided to adopt one.  They were delighted to have a beautiful baby girl.  So happy to the point that first, the wife decided to stay at home full time.  So she split her customers to her husband and my hairdresser.  After a few months, and the baby growing ever so charming, the husband also decided to stay home.  They figured they could live on rent income alone for awhile.  So my hairdresser got his client list.

What did she do?  Just being a happy great hairdresser.  I always enjoyed visiting her salon because not only was she good at haircut but she was so fun to talk with.

Another example.  I know a retired school teacher who travels the world, going to some of the most secret spots.  No, she doesn’t have the money.  She got acquainted to a wealthy widow who loved to travel.  She asked my friend to accompany her because traveling alone is no fun.  The widow pays for everything.  My friend just carries her pocket money.  And both are happy.

What did she do?  I have no idea.  Being a teacher, I guess she has the basic interpersonal skills.  And she has time and willingness to travel.  The last time I talked with her, they were planning to visit Galapagos.

Summary:  How to use the Law of Attraction to your favor

1. Cultivate the good feeling that comes from being yourself.
   This is the first and paramount step.  The rest may or may not be necessary.
2. Think some to direct the energy.
3. Live your life doing what you love and what you are inspired to do.

You don’t have to think specific thoughts to use the Law of Attraction.  What you ultimately want to manifest is the good feelings, to feel even better in the coming reality you are creating, and you can just feel your way with our without specific thoughts.

When you do think, think it clearly but not necessarily specifically. Attachment to specifics is about your ego.  Envision the new reality you are creating and know it is there. It’s almost like taking it for granted, but with gratitude for it.  (Some people call this believing.  I don’t personally like the word believing because it implies there is a discrepancy between what you believe and what it is.)

Ego thoughts have little to do with this process.  As I wrote, our ego is brings in mostly fear, which is counterproductive in using the Law of Attraction to your favor.  Our ego also makes judgments and try to dictate the process and outcome of manifestation, which is again counterproductive.  Your ego only knows what you have experienced or heard so far, and it badly limits the boundless possibilities.

And with Ascension process going on, we are dropping the ego anyway.

Our power to create

That is the how.  Now the why.  Why does the Law of Attraction work?  I’ve seen many arguments why it doesn’t work, but not arguments why it does indeed work.

Because we are God.  Some express the same saying  we are children of God, or we are connected to the Source energy.  Really the same thing.  If we are children of God, we are growing up to be God.  If we are connected to the Source, we have the same energy the Source has.  And just like God created the universe, we can create our lives.  Smaller scale, but the same working of the energy.

I know it’s hard to accept we are God.  If it’s easy, we have absolutely no problem using the Law of Attraction.  Our awareness hasn’t grown up to that level yet, so at this time, it’s easier to think that something outside of us, be it genie, the universe, or God, would give us what we want.

However, I want to point out that the more we realize our own divine power to create, the better the Law of Attraction works. If your mindset is like “If I beg, God or genie may give me what I want.”, you are disempowering yourself.    So while it’s okay to believe in external power sources, please do start raising your awareness of your own creative power.

“The Law of Attraction” is a somewhat misleading term.  It is called so because on the energetic level, like energies attract like energies. It is NOT about the object of your desire getting attracted and coming closer and closer to you.  Nothing is really outside of you.  You are creating your reality. The Law of Attraction is really the way we create.

I’ve been thinking and writing a lot about Ascension recently because I’m in it and I think it is affecting more and more people.  Maybe you are one of those who are experiencing it, and maybe you will soon.

And if you think it is all rosy and fun, just more and more increasing joy . . . well, yes and no.  The no comes from  my ego that is still hanging around. . . (Photo by Mr. Greenjeans)

What it’s like to just be

So many – the majority – of our motivations are based on fear.

• You work hard because – you love your work?  Or because you are afraid of losing your job?
• You save money because – you already have enough?  Or because you are afraid of not having money at some time in the future?
• You are with your spouse because – you love him or her?  Or because you are afraid of being alone?
• You take care of your health because – you love yourself?  Or because you are afraid of being sick?
• You say YES because — you love the idea?  Or because you are afraid of being rejected?

The list goes on and on.

And I’m finding it harder and harder to identify with the fear part.  It’s not about criticism.  I just find it hard to relate.  Which leaves me in a strange unfamiliar place of little motivation.  It’s good, but feels very weird to be here.

• Work hard?  Why?  I love my work, so I’m happy to do it, thank you.  But at the same time, I have no desire to work long hours.  And I don’t need to, either.
• Money?  Oh, I have some money.  Gratitude.  And I know – or at least I guess – I can make money as I go.
• Romance?  Yeah, that’s great!  (I’m currently not seeing anyone, so this feels more like an expectation than choice.)
• Health?  I’m in good health, and I’m grateful.
• . . . faithful readers of this blog know I have no problem saying NO to anyone . . .  duh . . .

So being is like being in emptiness.  I guess this is a temporary sentiment until my ego completely falls off.  For now, I’m grateful I don’t need to push myself for anything.  I am.  Thank you.

What no past life means to my business

Awhile ago, I was talking with my long-time client of Akashic Record Reading.  He had Ascension soul shift, and  said something interesting.

“So I got a new soul.  Then the reading and clearing I did for my former soul was . . . for what?”

I thought about this.  Because if more and more people are getting Ascension soul shift, maybe he is right, we don’t need to heal our energetic issues from past lives.  And if that is the case, I’m ready to fold my shop. I don’t know what I’d do next, but I’ll figure it out.  I’m not going to do the service that is unnecessary.

Because I have some waiting list, I’ve had to think as I go.  And it turns out my business is turning to fit to the new energy pattern of the Earth anyway.  More and more clients are those who have had Ascension soul shift.  They come to me to understand what the heck have happened to them, and to let their former souls move on.

I’m also learning from my Akashic Record Guides that some energetic issues, such as partial possessions, are best taken care of prior to Ascension soul shift.  I’m still not sure if this is the absolute requirement to have Ascension, but at least it is very desirable and promotes Ascension.

So looks like my service is still in need.  And I’m reviewing everything I do for potential update.  The big picture, the energy of Earth, is changing, so a thorough review of all I’ve been doing and offering is in need.

The glimpse of the New World

I think our current energy pattern is so lopsided due to the fear we have collectively.  When we drop these weird illusions and patterns, I think the world will see:

• Close to zero diseases and sickness, and therefore, little need for healthcare and healing (If you are in this industry, be prepared for eventual job loss)
• Extreme change in economic system.  The majority of economic transactions will be done either in small local community by cash (think of farmer’s market) or globally through the internet with virtual payment system. Businesses in between, like Wal-Mart, that moves stuffs long distance unnecessarily, would go away.  A lot of financial systems that promote credits would follow.  (If you are in these industries, be prepared for eventual job loss)
• The majority of “employments” will disappear, and most of us will be working for ourselves, doing what we love and be good at.  (If you are out of work, consider yourself to be having a head start.  The faster you figure out how to take care of yourself, the better.)
• Fundamental change in marital system.  Marriage and traditional family will still be a choice, but only one choice of many options.

Hmm.  Sounds good to me.  What do you think?

And today I’m grateful for the spring rain, the working computer and phone, my fresh carrot-apple-ginger juice, and cheesecake. (Sounds like the good and the evil of the food world are coexisting with me, huh?)

Success secrets – where are they?

Most people think their problem is they don’t know the secret to success.  Whether that success may be about making money, losing weight, or something else, most people are in this thinking habit.  “Those successful people knew something I don’t know.”  Gee, it’s so unfair.

So you do one of the two things:  One, you look for that secret formula.  You look and look everywhere and spend the majority of your energy in looking.  If you are reading this article, or if you are a fan of any other personal development blog, you may be this type.

The second reaction is you just stay where you are sulking – maybe someday you will be lucky enough to bump into that secret.  This doesn’t sound like Yes to Me reader, but you probably know someone like this.

And to both types the answer is: No.  That is NOT your problem.  Your aim is off the target. The real problem is something else.

You already know success secrets

If you really don’t have the basic understanding about the things you want to achieve, there is a point in learning that.  For example, if you want to be in healthy weight, you need to know the basics of nutrition – what carbohydrate, protein, and fat are and what they do in your body.  This knowledge leads to healthy eating plan that you can implement in your life.

However, I highly doubt if this is the case with you – if you are reading this blog, you already know the basics of personal development.  You know what you are supposed to do to achieve your goal of success.  In fact, you probably know a lot of the secrets of success, far beyond the basics.

For example, I just guest posted at Pick The Brain about how you can reinvent yourself by cleaning and decluttering your immediate physical environment.  The article shows a practical 21 day program of how to reinvent yourself outside in.  I tried this action plan myself and had great results.  Now my secret of success (at least one of them) is open to the public – anyone in the world can read it at Pick The Brain anytime.

But have you tried them?

All the tasks in the program are easy to do if you are in normal health.  They include opening the windows (literally), lightening your baggage (again, literally), dumping junks and making rooms for the new  (literally, in your bathroom, bedroom, work area, entrance and living area).

Now do you want to bet how many people would actually complete the 21 day program?  Or even start the program?

Or how about adding healing quality to your everyday drinking water by saying gratitude?  It’s very easy to do, and the potential benefit is huge.  Have you done it?  I did.  And got at least one positive result, as I shared in that article.  But so far I have heard from only two people who are doing this water gratitude practice.  I’m assuming most other readers just read it and haven’t tried it yet.

If you think these success tips are a bit too spiritual, how about Get Clients Now! Program for marketing?  It’s a 28 day program and I think it works great for those of you who have service oriented business.  You need to get the book, but books are so cheap compared to hiring a marketing coach.  And this book, written by an experienced marketing coach, makes it really easy to come up with a customized action plan.  Have you done it?

Or any other success tips, like the Law of Attraction or time management principles, that you read in the book or blog – have you tried it in your life?

How your ego resists the change you want

Let me guess why you don’t implement the action that you think might bring positive changes to your life:

1.    You want reassurance before you do it. You want guarantee it works.  You don’t want to try something until it is 100% guaranteed to work — with theoretical scientific explanation, plenty of case studies, recommendations from authorities, etc.   You are afraid of making mistakes in choosing your options. This excuse work especially well with spiritual development advice.

2.    You have other important things to do. You are busy.  You can’t be bothered to do new things, like saying “thank you” to the water.  Even though that takes only two seconds.  This excuse may go back to excuse #1 that you are too busy to do something that is not proven.

3.    You are afraid of doing it badly and failing it. That would be so embarrassing.  It’s hard to apply this to simple action plan like my 21 day of cleaning up your life, but it’s still possible.  Plus, if you are going to fail after spending your time and energy, what is the point of trying it at all?

4.    You actually love the situation you are in. You don’t want to change really, you just say you want it because that makes you look smart.  Maybe once in awhile, you try something half-heartedly to prove you did something, but again, in all it’s honesty, you really don’t want to change. In short, you are afraid of success.

Now let’s examine each excuse:

1.    What in life is 100% guaranteed? The method that worked perfectly for someone may not work for you. You are different, and your situation is different, the timing is different. So no one ever can give you 100% guarantee for anything.  Therefore, this excuse works always.

I’d like to think you are sincere in your desire to achieve success, however.  You are not using this excuse just to get away from it. You are using this excuse because you are afraid and you want assurance.

What it is is that your ego, who is used to the status quo, is resisting the change. So it spits out this “rational” doubt that prevents you from taking action.

2.    So what is really important? To keep up with your busy life or to progress in achieving your goals?  Do you realize that, when you do achieve your success, your life will change significantly, and many of the things that are important to you now may not be as important?

This is just another excuse your ego use to fight against potential changes and try to stay in the status quo. You may hate your busy yet boring life, but . . . you know it so well, and familiarity may feel comfy.

3.    If you are going to worry too much about what others might think of you, you are going to have a really boring life. When you fail, there will always be people who point it out to your attention, as if you may not know it already, and they will also remember it for the rest of their life and remind you occasionally.  They are also not happy when you succeed by the way.  When you succeed, they will criticize you for any shortcomings they can possibly find.

These are their egos trying to keep you at your current status quo so that they don’t have to feel pressured to change their status quo.  You need to learn how to identify these manipulation techniques.  Don’t let your own ego resonate with theirs.

Regarding your own feeling about failure – this is often said, but really, there is no failure.  It is a learning experience.  If you fail, figure out how and why you failed, and try again.  Life is a process when we view it from the soul level.  And if you think you are too busy for trial and error learning experiences, well – go back to #2.

4.   This is exactly your ego talking. You are really smart and honest if you dug out this excuse from the depth of your awareness.  Usually, the ego utilizes cover-up tactics like #1, 2 or 3, but here, it’s talking straight. Yes, your ego is afraid of the changes, even the positive changes.

Because success comes with responsibilities.  Once you achieve your ideal weight, you need to maintain it.  Moreover, you no longer can use overweight as the excuse of not having a relationship.  Your status has changed, and that comes with new level of awareness and responsibilities.  Isn’t it easier to just whine how hard it is to lose weight?

I’d like to trust you have the courage to get over this ego’s resistance.  This may take hitting the bottom really hard to realize you really want to succeed.

What is the antidote?

Make it simple.  You can take action even when your ego is screaming its protest.  Get up and open the window.  Go to the fridge, pour some water to the glass, and say thank you.  Each takes less than a minute, and you have the strength to ignore your ego for a minute.

Try and see how you feel.  Once you get used to taking small actions despite the fact you feel your ego’s resistance, you can step up and try taking more ambitious actions.

I know this is harder than it sounds.  The ego is stubborn and sneaky.  It will come back to you again and again to claim its old position.  I’ve dealt with my own ego, and I continue to do so, so I know.  I can say, however, the dealing gets easier as I gain insight and experience about how the ego works.

So what is the catch with success secrets?

Finding success secrets is not that hard.  We live in the information age.  The catch is that, for most of us, the Self who desires success and the ego that likes the lukewarm status quo are split and at conflict against each other.

So you need to learn how to proceed for your highest purpose even when you feel the ego’s resistance.  And this can only be done by implementing what you think may be the success secret.  You don’t learn this by contemplating about the ego, the life purpose, etc.

Now go do something that you think may even remotely improve your life. Cheers ^_^  (Photo by Mike Pedroncelli)